Addiction or satisfying some important needs?

There are few new things in psychiatry nowadays. After the initial breakthrough of neuroscience some 10 years ago, when every psychiatrist, neurologist, psychologist and even philosopher was a bit of a neuroscientist, there were some less important fashionable subjects of discussion, including genetics, sexual & body dysphoria, ADHD and whether to keep giving amphetamines to children and, perhaps the most enduring subject, the addiction to computer games and social media. This went further and triggered the defining of a clinical entity of its own, classified among heavy addictions such as cocaine or alcohol. But, must the social media be regarded as a disorder or as a functioning solution to a problem, albeit an inefficient one?

Perhaps we should point out that most countries in the Western world have bred “addictive societies”. The citizens are often called “consumers” and everything created or made is “delivered” as a “product” or a “service”. The main triggers are hunger and greed, and everything is optimized so as to capture attention and induce or facilitate “one more click” or “one more scroll” on the smartphone. I don’t think that people grasp it well, but the entire design of the Western society is based on addictive behavior being induced and rewarded (by “social status” or “coupons”, for instance). So, social media addiction is nothing more than just another addiction in a sea of collective addictions… And for this reason, escaping from social media would likely mean entering in another readily available addiction, easily accessible in the surrounding environment. So, keeping this in mind, I would like to highlight two aspects.

One should not overlook the desire of the human being to make an impact, to leave a trace in this world. Each social media comment someone makes is a veiled attempt to make an impact on another person, on someone else. If the other one replies to that comment, or at least gives a “like”, the initiator gets a boost of attention but also a boost of impact: he/she feels that he/she made a difference with that comment, something that has been acknowledged by the other. So, giving “likes” and writing comments, or even sharing someone’s work, could be seen as “attention seeking behavior”, but also as a way to create an illusion of making or having an impact. And this is addictive. Why?

A case could be built on the hypothesis that each person excessively willing to leave a trace (and make an impact) was neglected by her parental figures during her childhood. It is rather simplistic but, in general, we seek more of what we didn’t have. If the attention seeking behavior is linked to a lack of explicitly shown love, we could also argue that the craving for impact is linked to emotionally cold, dismissive and indifferent parents, who failed to validate the need of their children to make an impression on them. And a child who doesn’t matter to his own parent will try to matter to somebody else and – why not? – change the world though his/her impactful actions. Starting a new religion (or just a sect), starting a war (or ending one) and going to Mars (or only to the Earth’s orbit) are all impactful deeds. And somewhere – we hope – and ‘they’ hope – an insensitive mother might watch, might finally be emotionally touched, might finally smile a bit…

Another aspect of social media would be linked to making meaningful connections. When the family and the friends in the “offline world” are not (emotionally) enough (for various reasons), people online can step in and make a difference. It is not unusual to have better friends online than offline. The social media offers something rare in the “real world”: the ability to speak your mind without being challenged or criticized, the ability to belong to a group with which you share common values, and the opportunity to pay less attention to how you look (you can have a handicap or see yourself as ugly, something that is irrelevant if you hide behind an avatar). Plus, social media is also a “safe space”, since you can always retreat, cut the connection, leave the chat room, “unfriend” and “unfollow”, without the need to explain yourself, something which is much more difficult to do in the “real world”, where you need to face adversity, negotiate, go through emotionally challenging situations and where you have far less control on any consequences that might arise. On social media, you can always delete your profile and create a new one, with a (hopefully) different persona; in real life your persona (or social mask) is unique and any mistakes you make (such as saying something controversial) do have consequences, some of them for many years or for your entire life. So, if you are risk adverse, social media is a breath of fresh air. But, it is also a failed opportunity to face your fears and to initiate change. Classical drugs help you do exactly that: avoid.

So, instead of asking you about your social media addiction potential, I should better ask you about your need to have an impact and about the quality of your emotional upbringing as a child. It is something worth pondering on. It is also important to meditate on the “perceived positive side” of social media. And finally, questions about the addictive design of the Western society should also be raised…